i am near tears i am so fucking angry. i just want someone to tell me WHY jennifer is so stupid. and not just stupid like oh she’s so dumb but just why she is so MENTALLY FUCKING STUPID. there’s no other excuse for her behavior. and i’m gonna feel bad for some of the stuff i’m saying if it was directed towards anyone else but her. but i have never hated someone so much that it physically hurt me. i can’t even think about her name anymore. and i wish someone could just tell me WHY i let this happen to me? why do i do this? why can’t i just live with a roommate and NOT have to move out? it shouldn’t be this difficult. and i’m pretty sure this entire thing is not my fault. i am not to blame for this. but it still happened. i’m so sick of people. and it scares me to say that but i seriously just about hate all of humanity. because i don’t know enough GOOD people. i get that people have flaws. but i truly feel that the people i know are conniving and evil and don’t deserve to even be on this earth. they shouldn’t be allowed to talk to other human beings.
so i’m gonna say some mean stuff because this is my blog and i can’t say this to anyone else.
first of all jennifer is hideous. she’s the grossest ugliest nastiest person i know. and not just because she’s ginormous but because she has a terrible personality. she doesn’t have any relationships because she has the social maturity of a 4 year old. all she does is makes fun of other people to their faces and laughs about it and expects it to be ok BUT when its turned around on her the world ends. if someone makes fun of jennifer or laughs at her then they are the worst person on the planet.
her dad has herpes. yeah jennifer guess fucking what? your fucking dad has herpes. so there. but did i tell you that? no i didn’t. so therefore i DID NOT bash on your god damn family. but you felt it entirely necessary to tell ME that my ex boyfriend treated me the same way my dad treats my mom. which is insulting four people in one fucking sentence.
you will never be as good as anyone in your family. you will NEVER measure up to anyone in your family. and its your own fault. its because you’re stuck in an immature world where everything is everyone else’s fault and you can do no wrong.
you are the most insecure person i have ever seen and it sickens me and disgusts me. i know i’m insecure but after witnessing the person you are it makes me want to change real fast. because YOU are pathetic. you are gross.
you don’t deserve a relationship and you won’t get one. no one will be able to stand you
you’re stupid. you’re just dumb. you think you make all the right decisions and you’re so grown up and you have it entirely wrong. you quit college one year in and you’re STILL paying off the debt. you have over 500 fucking movies which cost more money than i even care to count and you’re still paying that off. you work at ameriprise and you think you’re the coolest person in the world. you work customer service. you really think you’re special? you’re not.
no guy will ever come near you so quit pretending you think they will. it’s wishful thinking.
what you have said to me:
1. i’m a codependent bitch. wrong. do you know what the definition of codependent is? it’s when one person stays in a relationship where one person is psychologically dependent in an unhealthy way on someone who is addicted. and let me inform you i’m not addicted to anything.
2. you say i’m not moved out of the apartment yet because i can’t do anything alone and i can’t make any decisions. well first of all yeah i can’t move myself out of the fucking apartment cause i’m not the god damn hulk and i own a PT CRUISER. since when will a dresser and a bed even fit in that and since when does anyone move a fucking dresser alone?
3. i’m a dumb bitch i’m a dumbass i’m stupid i’m in school for no reason and will never use my education. really? fucking really? and then i tell you that you quit everything which is true you can’t stay in an apartment with another person can you? fuck you.
just fucking fuck you. i hope you’re right. i hope i am a bitch. because if thats what you think then fine. i stand up for myself. i don’t let YOU call all the shots or walk all over me or tell me what’s right. i’m not going to coddle you because you feel bad about yourself because you SHOULD feel bad about yourself you’re a terrible person. and if that makes me a bitch then i’m proud of that.
i really dont know how to overcome how much i hate her and how much i regret a lot of things. i regret moving in with her. i regret moving in with helen and moving out of helens i regret everything with brian. i regret not doing better in school. i regret moving to stevens point with a friend. i regret living with a friend.
basically these last four years have sucked way more than they’ve been good. each time i think it’s gonna get better it doesn’t something else happens.
i hate my ex. i hate my dad for being an alcoholic and being a lazy piece of shit who doesn’t do anything that he says he’s gonna do. i hate my mom for being an enabler and not standing up for herself and being lazy and only working 20 hours a week and not moving out even tho she wants to and not divorcing my dad even tho she wants to i hate my brother for being a spoiled piece of shit who doesn’t do shit and thinks his life is SO god damn hard when he pretty much leads the easiest life possible to lead. i hate ashley for being immature and thinking its my fault i hate everyone who tells me to grow up because really? how the fuck am i not grown up?